fragments of crap

the mood was melancholic just awhile ago.

but since my brothers are back the atmosphere is here and I feel less depressed and lonely. Nowadays, I feel disturbed my solitude, I hate being alone. (and strangely enough I loved the feeling of being alone just recently). Tommorow is a disturbing date, and I don't want to think about it at all.

I couldn't sleep well last night. my dad was sorta discussing something with my uncle and then they got so loud and personal. hate it, couldn't even sleep properly on the 2nd floor. So I was using com throughout the night, till 1pm plus. That is soo wrong. People need to sleep you know. Then my aunt joined, pretty weird crap. But it's settled? I don't know, but I guess.....It's NOT MY PROBLEM! wahahahahaha.

Been listening to alot of Chopin recently. "secret" influence perhaps. Haha.

"年轻人要多听音乐，才不会胡斯乱想"

Lol, a quote from secret. It seems quite corny at first, but it is quite true. i must guard my thoughts, i must protect myself from the demon of melancholy. Music therapy works.

Listening to Chopin's Scherzo No 2 in B flat minor....

Went for 7:30 service ths morning, had problems waking up (thanks to all that commotion last night). but I feel refreshed. And I had a weird dream, I dreamt about Promo results. And it was like a thriller dream. =.=, though I didn't really like what I dreamt....

Im looking for someone to play 四手联弹 with me.

Yesterday was a rather fruitful day. In the morning I lazed around and pianoed here abit and there. I went for training after a long break. And it was fine. Because of interhouse games I guess my strokes are almost all back. My speed and strength are far behind though. Then after training went to jump. It was a very intensive session where we learnt the difference between catholics and protestants, but I shall not go into detail here, then followed by a high level discussion (in my opinion) of different types of churchs, charismatic and stuff. complete BluRnEss! But i still benefitted from subconscious information diffusion...

Went running with junwei, doreen and qi heng. It was quite an okay run, I felt fine which I shouldn't be because I just had training like 2 plus hours ago. Ran about 3 plus Km of up and down hills (which are super annoying). It started to drizzle on us, so we decided to head back. Junwei and dorreen told me and qi heng to go ahead so we started running at a faster pace. Then we were supposed to stop outside a designated school (what was it again? I forgot). Then Qi heng started sprinting at an IMBAL pace which I couldn't even catch. soon, i lost sight of him. It's not about stamina anymore, it's about speed. pure speed....He vanished. I freaked out.

So fit people are like this.

What I used to be, was just the tip of the iceberg. But now I must focus of regaining that me. My 9 min 2.4 km run, and stuff. Where did all of them go? Where have I wasted all my life.

That was yesterday, ended with dinner at KFC and chatted about sutff and went home late. Slacked around on com, listened to tons of classicals and then went to sleep very late.

Pretty long post. I wonder who will read.