I would to say that new years is one of the most paradoxically confusing events of the year. Humans are after all, pretty contradictory beings capable of feeling multifarious and even opposing feelings at the same time. It is only when we examine ourselves, ask ourselves and search for that happiness within us that we wonder, are we really happy as we watch the fireworks, hang out with friends or do the epic drum roll. What I am trying to say is that, these things don't really actually make us happy right? For myself, for the past 18 years as a student I had to struggle with parting with my holidays on new year's day. And the following year's challenges never fail to make me sigh. For army boys, returning to camp. For working adults, returning to work. This event, doesn't really mark anything good. it marks the end of your blissful festive season and returning to your everyday meaningless life.
As we return from parties, countdown, hang outs of gatherings, how many of us are actually being plagued by this meaningless controversy. this unexplainable burst of confusion within us. Asking ourselves, what now?
For most, we are eager, excited because it is these events that make life "meaningful" and when these events actually end, it takes it's toll on us. I had sleepovers for many of my new year eves. And when I awoke in all that sticky goo of my own perspiration and sleeping in an uncomfortable position, I found myself feeling a strange bitter sadness kind of emotion. Something which was existing in the air, yet not exactly very tangible or obvious. What was it?
Sometimes, the thrill in life is not the things we look forward to but rather the looking forward process. We do not feel happy after attaining what we want, but in fact, we are banished to square one where it is the lobby where we search for which floor we want to go now.
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